Last night...

The world is so much bigger than me....

The music, the living, the thoughts, the perfection... we strive to believe that which we have achieved... that which we have not discovered, has been discovered. Our eyes have been deceived by the intoxication of the upheld. The qualms of the public have raped me of my identity and of my choice. There is no identity left here.

On the risk of turning into a cynic, i shall criticize the minuteness of myself in this world. I shall criticize the minuteness of my voice and of my person. Why do I think the things i do. They are because of you. I fucking hate you.

But I touch you. I touch you and i feel magic. I feel the electricity run through my fingers and into you. I feel you feel me. I feel your voice penetrate me. I cant find the words... I just can’t find the words....

My world is different from yours... but my heart is intertwined with yours. I feel what you feel. But i must leave my ego at the door to hear your voice... i must let go of myself to let you in... you will be forever lost in the noise of my silence if i don’t hear you... I must hear you... i long to hear you...

I, Me, Myself... when does this story leave me... when am i free from myself... when can I see me in your light, in your eyes, in you...Now, I feel that i am you. I feel that you are me. My voice comes out of you... you cannot say anything that will harm me... you are in sync with me... I cannot help but break down in tears when i am reminded of you. I need to stop here and remember you... pure... sweet... like thick, intoxicating honey....

I am lost because i cant find the words. So i will borrow them. I will try and then i will err. I will search the deepest corners of my soul... Don’t hear my words... hear me feel.. hear me suffer... hear it in my voice, but don’t hear my words.