There is this state of self knowing. It is something so ineffable because it is purely that. A state that you might be able to empathize or sympathize with or whatever, but you will never be here....never truely because it is mine and my own... I can try to share it with you but you will never understand... its like a place that i can push you to but you will never reach. Its that candle that burns in the distance. That glow that I long for you to see.... its warmth I long to share with you.... but you will never feel it. And in that solitariness, lies my downfall.
So then what is left? Where is that resonating space where you and I will thump to the same beat. Where our rhythms converge in this delightful swirl of melody and harmony and beat. My path is not perfect. I might not hit that sacrimonious note. But neither is yours. Your voice is as polluted as mine is. It is as corrupt and selfish. So then I ask of you. Where is that resonating space?
there is this emotion....i see it in her eyes.. i hear it in her laugh... i feel it in her smile....
when do you see it? when do you see that raw emotion, no thought, no complication, just feeling? I saw it tonight. I felt it tonight. I know you will probably never come here so I can write this now and feel safe. You gave me freedom. In that one moment, in that one swift sweeping of my feet, I belonged to you.... you belonged to me.
I will probably never meet you again, but you were my lightning in that dark room. You were my purity through the intoxication. In that one moment, you gave me more than I could take in any lifetime to come. The scene was cliched, but you were your own. You discovered me with your eyes and your smile. I dissolved in your arms.
And then you were gone. As swift as you were to arrive, you vanished behind this curtain of complete anonymity. Complete anonymity.
Where am I now? What changes now? I know you will never see this and that is why I'm not scared of who reads it.
That feeling. That touch. It lingers on my skin. It lingers like an addiction being born. I can see your face but I don't remember it. I can see the blue in your eyes even now. If only I had something. Anything.
Well as most of you might already know, I LOVE Indian rock music! The only thing is, I don't really get to listen to much of it. So saying that, I have initiated what might be the most awesome musical journey/ blog experience that I will ever go on, and I want YOU to be part of it!
oooooohk... so I have been lazy... I know... I'm going through some serious blogstipation, and a bad case of mind-fucked-ness... so here is something that you, my beloved three readers, can chew upon for a while...
Also!!!! The video for Junkyard Groove's Its Ok is finally DONE!!! Check it out HERE or just scroll to the end of this post :).
"Cookie Jar"
I would turn on the TV but it's so embarrassing To see all the other people I don't know what they mean And it was magic at first when they spoke without sound But now this world is gonna hurt you better turn that thing down Turn it around
"It wasn't me", says the boy with the gun "Sure I pulled the trigger but it needed to be done Cause life's been killing me ever since it begun You cant blame me cause I'm too young"
"You can't blame me sure the killer was my son But I didn't teach him to pull the trigger of the gun It's the killing on this TV screen You cant blame me its those images he seen"
Well "You can't blame me", says the media man Well "I wasn't the one who came up with the plan I just point my camera at what the people want to see Man it's a two way mirror and you cant blame me"
"You can't blame me", says the singer of the song Or the maker of the movie which he based his life on "It's only entertainment and as anyone can see The smoke machines and makeup and you cant fool me"
It was you it was me it was every man We've all got the blood on our hands We only receive what we demand And if we want hell then hells what well have
And I would turn on the TV But it's so embarrassing To see all the other people I don't even know what they mean And it was magic at first But let everyone down And now this world is gonna hurt You better turn it around Turn it around
- Jack Johnson
Its Ok, Its Alright, We're the same and there's no need to cry!
Spring is here. I don't think I have ever seen anything as beautiful as the first sign of leaves growing back onto the trees. Its something that i have never noticed before. Beautiful.
The leaves start out as shoots, like little buds ready to explode, and then one morning you wake up and those little buds have exploded into an awesome neon green eruption of colour.
The leaves make me reminisce on the past winter. I can now say I too know what it feels like to live through those long, cold winter nights. But the long wait for warmth made spring so much more sweet. It made me enjoy and appreciate such simple things, like sitting out in the sun. Just sitting.
I can feel it now. I can feel the energy from the sun enter me. Such a beautiful feeling that I had never noticed before now. And whats amazing is that its always been there, but now I know. Maybe this is what living is about. Maybe 'life' is just a process of appreciation. In our youth, we grow up intoxicated with materialistic attitudes and our desires end up blinding us. And then with time we age, and understand the people and things that really matter and what we have consciously or subconsciously gained from them. And with that realization, we begin to appreciate the incredible-ness that is this living, breathing existance.
Its a nice thought. It comforts me. This post kinda drove this idea. Its wierd, because i wrote it :).
p.s. I know i contradict myself and my ideas quite frequently, but i dont really care. Everybody is allowed to have an opinion, but i want to have em all :D.
